10 funny quiz show answers (part 9)

As confirmed by my eight previous blog posts on the subject of funny quiz show answers, there are many occasions when quiz show contestants gave answers that were amusingly silly. This week I feature ten more silly answers, but first, here's some advice for the contestant who gave the first answer. Always listen carefully to the question.

Personally, I prefer to toast marshmallows,
rather than people, over a fire.

1) "Has London hosted the Olympic Games twice or three times?"
"Once."



2) "Name a way of toasting someone."
"Over a fire."

When tweets go wrong (part 3)

From time to time, the Charles Fudgemfuffin likes to take a look at occasions when ill-thought out tweets have back-fired. Here are a few more of those occasions...

1) CNN refer to women as 'individuals with a cervix'

Providing further proof that the world, and specifically the media, is going mad just to placate a few loonies, CNN tweeted about a report on cervical cancer screening aimed at 'individuals with a cervix'.

Or 'women', to use the terminology preferred by non-insane people.

CNN struggle to grasp reality.

Unsurprisingly, this led to well deserved mockery of CNN, and it also inspired the #IndividualWithACervixSongs hashtag. Here are some of my favourites...

"You’re once, twice, three times an individual with a cervix." 🎵

Dead Men Tell No Tales

Dead Men Tell No Tales
by Charles Fudgemuffin

Good news! My latest book, 'Dead Men Tell No Tales' was released last week. Without giving away too many spoilers, the title of the book gives a slight hint as to the direction the plot may possibly take.

Anyway, to publicise 'Dead Men Tell No Tales', this week's blog post takes a light-hearted look at the subject of death...

1) Wild advice

If you encounter a polar bear in the wild, lie down and pretend you're dead.

It's good practice for when you'll be really dead, two minutes later.

2) Silly questionnaire

I've featured stupid questions before on the Charles Fudgemuffin blog, but the following question found on an insurance application form has to be the stupidest of them all...

Funny football chants

A new season of football action gets underway this weekend with the Community Shield*, and thankfully this season the fans are finally back.

* Previously known as the Charity Shield until the FA had to change the name because it didn't meet the standards set out in UK charity law.

"Hooray! The government have given football fans
their permission to go to football stadiums again!"

So to celebrate the return of football fans to stadiums, this week the Charles Fudgemuffin blog takes a look at some of the amusing chants sung by football supporters in the days before governments got to decide whether supporters were allowed into grounds...

1) After signing Brazilian winger Richarlison, Everton fans came up with a song in honour of their new signing (sang to the tune of She's Electric by Oasis):

"He's Brazilian. He only cost £50 million, and we think he's *cough cough* brilliant. Richarlison."




2) Leeds United fans came up with a twist on ‘You've Lost That Loving Feeling’ when they played Coventry City who had just sold Peter Ndlovu and Noel Whelan:

“You've lost Ndlovu and Whelan. Oh, Ndlovu and Whelan. You've lost Ndlovu and Whelan. Now they're gone, gone, gone, woah-oh-woah...”