Saturday 27 June 2020

Funny name changes by deed poll

Every year thousands of people in the UK change their name by deed poll. In most cases this is due to marital reasons, but in some cases it's simply people being a bit silly!

Personally, I think it's ridiculous when people change their name to something stupid! Why can't people just stick to their normal sensible names ... like myself, Charles Fudgemuffin!? **shifty eyes **

A cheeseburger.
Not to be confused with Mr Cheeseburger.
Anyway, here are just a few of the unusual names that people have changed their names to by deed poll...

1) Bacon Double Cheeseburger


Simon Smith was such a big fan of fast food that he changed his name by deed poll to Bacon Double Cheeseburger!

On the positive side, this has brought him numerous offers of free food from several fast food chains. However, on the down side, he is now considering changing it back again, as apparently his girlfriend is reluctant to marry a Cheeseburger!

Saturday 20 June 2020

10 music jokes for National Music Day (part 3)

Tomorrow* is National Music Day (June 21st), so sticking with the subject of music, here's another collection of musically themed jokes...

* Only if you're reading this blog post on the day it was published, i.e. June 20th. If you're reading this blog post on any of the other 364 days of the year, then tomorrow won't be National Music Day. Apologies for any confusion.

Two wind turbines.
1) How does a musician say the alphabet?
A, B, 💿, E, F, G...


2) I sat next to an insurance salesman at a Robbie Williams concert last night.
And through it all, he offered me protection.


3) Two wind turbines were in a field.
The first wind turbine asked the second wind turbine, "What type of music do you like?"
The second wind turbine replied, "I'm a big heavy metal fan".

Saturday 13 June 2020

10 Chinese code words to avoid censorship (part 1)

Big Panda is watching you!
Censorship exists to a degree in the West, and it's been getting worse in recent years, but the censorship we face is nothing compared to the censorship that takes place in China.

To get around the censorship, Chinese internet users have cleverly come up with a series of code words and coded terms to substitute for censored words and phrases.

Here are some of those code words.

1) June 4th = May 35th


As you can imagine, the Chinese government are very draconian in censoring all discussion of the Tiananmen Square Massacre. Incredibly, that censorship even extends to the date that the massacre took place!

The Tiananmen Square Massacre occurred on June 4th 1989, so any mention of that date is censored by the Chinese government. To get around this, Chinese internet users cleverly refer to June 4th as May 35th.

Saturday 6 June 2020

What do you love more, football or...?

Euro 2020 was originally due to start in a few days' time, but because of the corona virus it's now been postponed until next year. So for the benefit of anyone who is suffering from football withdrawal symptoms, this week's blog post has a footballing theme!

Here are some interesting results from a survey about the World Cup and specifically what men would be willing to do if England made the World Cup final...

1) Football crazy


Wife: "What are you thinking?"
Husband: "I'm just wondering what the England score is,
er, I mean ... I'm thinking how wonderful it's going
to be to spend the rest of our life together!"
39% of men would pull a sickie if England made the final and they had chance to get a ticket.




2) Football before friends


16% of men would miss a friend's wedding if it clashed with the World Cup final and England were in the final.

We had a discussion about this at work and several people were shocked that some men would miss their friend's wedding to attend the World Cup final, but I have to say I was shocked because I expected the percentage to be a lot higher than this!