Weird headlines (with a corona virus theme)

The corona virus produced a number of weird headlines during its peak. Here are some of the weirdest, and for every headline, I've provided a link for proof.

1) German cafe reopens but makes customers wear pool noodles on their heads

This one had me giggling away to myself at how utterly crazy it would be to sit in the cafe pretending everything's normal when everyone has got these stupid foam noodles on their heads!

If it was me, I would be laughing too much to eat my food. Judging by the people in the photo though, they seem to be fine with it.

I think it would be pretty cool to carry on this tradition once the corona virus is over, just for the pure comedy value of sitting in a cafe eating your food with brightly coloured foam noodles on your head!

Headline: German cafe makes customers wear pool noodles on their heads

2) Dayton commission bans wearing masks while committing crimes

"Hey, you! It's illegal to wear that
mask while committing a crime!"

I think I may have spotted one tiny little flaw in the logic of the person who created this crazy law. Can you guess what it is? Here's a clue...

Bank robber: "Okay, I must remember not to wear a mask while I rob this bank ... because that would be illegal!"

For the benefit of the imbecile who created this ridiculous law, if someone is planning to commit a crime, then they're not going to worry about breaking the law. That's already been established by the fact that they're committing a crime!

Headline: Masks banned while committing crimes

3) Florida man died in a motorcycle crash, and his death was listed as a covid-19 death.

People can get quite emotional about the best way to tackle the corona virus, but surely something we can all agree on is that motorcycle deaths shouldn't be classed as corona virus deaths!

Headline: Motorcycle crash death listed as corona virus death

4) Keith from Norfolk wants sunbathers to be shot by the army

"I've spotted a sunbather, sarge."

One man from Norfolk has come up with a rather extreme way to control the spread of the corona virus ... shoot people!

This is a headline which had me giggling away to myself at the way it was written in the style of a radio phone-in show.

Radio host: "And next we have Keith on the line from Norfolk. Keith, what's your comment?"
Keith from Norfolk: "Hello, yes. I'd like the army to shoot sunbathers..."

I also love how he was very specific that it had to be the army. Sign up now for a life in the army to protect your country from international threats, terrorists and ... sunbathers!

Headline: Keith from Norfolk wants sunbathers shot by the army

5) Gary Anderson has withdrawn from the PDC Home Tour because his WiFi connection is not strong enough

"Poor wifi? That's a red card offence!"

A darts player withdrawing from a tournament because his wifi wasn't strong enough is one headline that no-one could have predicted!

For the benefit of anyone who doesn't follow darts, the PDC Home Tour was introduced after the lockdown with darts players competing against each other from their own homes. Obviously though, in order to stream their performance, the darts players needed a strong wifi connection, and sadly, Gary Anderson's wifi wasn't up to the job.

Anyway, it has to be one of the most unusual reasons for being eliminated from a sports competition that I can remember.

Headline: Gary Anderson withdraws due to poor wifi

6) Police confront nudist sunbathers over not wearing face masks amid corona virus outbreak

Keith from Norfolk would be furious!

The idea of sunbathers wearing nothing but a mask is so ridiculous that it sounds like something from a Monty Python sketch, but as you can see from the photo, it is actually a real headline.

However, this is an all ages blog, so I've pixelated the photo to avoid exposing anyone to the disgusting image. I mean, if they'd been wearing a mask then that would have been fine, but no masks? Urgh, disgusting!

All I can say is, they're lucky it was the police who confronted them, and not Keith from Norfolk!

Headline: Police confront sunbathers over not wearing masks

If you're looking for more weird headlines, then check out my previous creatively titled blog posts:
Weird headlines (part 1)
Weird headlines (part 2)