Taking things literally

This week the Charles Fudgemuffin blog takes a look at a few examples where things were taken just a little bit too literally.

1) The top states to live in

If you're American and you've ever wondered what the top states to live in are, then the following image provides the answer.

Bonus Alaska joke:

An Alaskan was on trial, and the prosecutor asked him, "Where were you on the night of October to April?"

2) Bringing Waitrose to your door.

Next up, the driver of this Waitrose truck obviously took their slogan just a little bit too literally...

"Bringing our store to your door."

I hope they didn't drop the alphabet spaghetti. That could spell disaster!

3) Seasonal Silliness

It's March and that means spring is in the air!

Literally!

Credit: Know Your Meme

Bonus spring joke:

Should you plant flowers in April?
May as well.

4) Literal calendar

If you've ever wondered what the Gregorian calendar is, then here's a literal explanation:

Monday: Greg
Tuesday: Ian
Wednesday: Greg
Thursday: Ian
Friday: Greg
Saturday: Ian
Sunday: Greg

5) Narrow escape

Phew! That was a narrow escape!

Literally a narrow escape.

A fire broke out at my local yodeling school. Everyone was asked to use the fire exits in an orderly orderly orderly manner.

6) The secret to omniscience

Finally, if you read these two books, you will literally know everything!

What they teach you and don't teach you at
Harvard Business School, i.e. everything.

On a related note, I just got into Harvard!

I found an open window and climbed inside. You would have thought they would have had better security.

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Legal Disclaimer: If you were to actually read both these books, I suspect you wouldn't literally know everything. It's just a silly joke. It's not intended to be taken literally.

Editor's note: "Charles, I thought taking things literally was the whole point of the blog post?"
Charles: "No, the point of the blog post was to post silly pictures and daft jokes."

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The title of my book 'Dead Men Tell No Tales' is literally correct! It's also literally available for kindle from Amazon.

The word 'literally' is one of the most misused words in the English language. You can find amusing examples of this in my previous blog posts:
Funny 'literally' quotes (part 5)
"My stomach literally fell out of my body!"