Sunday, 29 December 2013

Ten Less Common New Year's Resolutions

Some wise, some unique and some just weird...

In a few days' time many people will be starting the new year by making New Year's Resolutions with popular choices being to give up smoking, lose weight or to travel more and see new places.  However, if you're thinking of making a less common resolution this year and looking for ideas, then here are a few non-conventional and less obvious New Year's resolutions I found dotted around the internet...

"I will never turn up drunk at court again.  Hic!"

1) I will assure my lawyer that I will never turn up drunk at court ever again.

Hmm, yes.  That's probably a wise resolution to make.

2) I will take time to appreciate what I have achieved.

This is a resolution I think I might make as well.  Obviously I've never climbed Everest or swam the channel or stuff like that, so I'm keeping things in perpective, but sometimes I set myself goals and then move straight on to the next thing without taking a few moments to allow myself a smile at having finished the thing I set out to do.  So this year I'm going to allow myself a few more self-indulgent smiley moments.

3) I will lose weight by buying a more accurate set of scales.

Yes, blame the scales.

4) Every time I miss a session at the gym, I will give $20 to my daughter.

This is quite a clever resolution, as they're giving themself a financial incentive to stick to their goal.  However, presumably they love their daughter, so an even more effective resoluion would be to give money to someone they didn't like...

5) I will lose weight ... or failing that I'll just buy some bigger clothes.

It's always wise to have a plan B in case your first goal doesn't quite come off.

6) I won't make a New Year's resolution as I am already perfect.

Whoever made this one probably said it tongue in cheek, but it made me smile.

A victim of mistaken identity?

7) I will stop blaming the dog when I fart.

In my house whenever someone farts it generally is the dog.  Unless everyone is secretly just blaming the dog when actually it's them...

8) I will read more authors outside of my usual favourites.

Now that I've finally got around to buying a tablet with the Kindle app installed, this is a resolution which makes more sense than ever, especially with Amazon allowing you to download a free sample of most books and try a new author risk-free.

9) 1280 x 800

Sorry, I think whoever made this resolution got a bit muddled up.

And finally...

10) I will procrastinate more.  On second thoughts, I'll wait until next year.

You can check out the top ten most commonly made New Year's resolutions, as well as a New Year themed 'True or False' quiz at the following links:
Top Ten New Year's Resolutions
True Or False: Six New Year Themed 'Facts' From Around The World

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About The Author

The 'How To Save The World' books
by Charles Fudgemuffin
Charles Fudgemuffin is the author of the alien comedy 'How To Save The World' books which are available for Kindle from Amazon.  The first book in the series is available from the following link:
How To Save The World: An Alien Comedy

As with all Kindle books, you can also download a free sample of the first few chapters.

Please note, the 'How To Save The World' books contain material suitable for ages 18+ and are not recommended for prudes or squares.