Wikipedia vandalism (Part 3: Football special!)

It's become something of a tradition on the Charles Fudgemuffin blog to celebrate each new season of the Premier League with a football related blog post.

This week is no exception as I take a football themed look at another subject which has graced the blog from time to time ... wikipedia vandalism.

1) Tottenham Hotspur (Bottling Company)

Tottenham have come close to the Premier League title in recent years, but they always seem to bottle it right at the end, leading someone to make the following edit to the wikipedia entry for 'List of Bottling companies'...

Tottenham Hotspur: Famous bottlers.

To be fair, I'm a Newcastle United fan, so I can only dream of coming close to winning the title, only to bottle it in the last few games!

Wikipedia: Bottling companies (Tottenham Hotspur)

2) Kepa Arrizabalaga (Chelsea manager)

In the 2019 Carabao Cup final, Chelsea keeper Kepa Arrizabalaga stubbornly refused to be substituted by manager Marizio Sarri.

This prompted a double wikipedia edit, with someone editing Kepa's wikipedia entry to read...

"Playing position: Manager"

And they also edited the wikipedia list of Chelsea mangers to include Kepa...

Kepa: Chelsea manager for the Carabao Cup final.

The thing I found bizarre was that the referee allowed him to stay on the pitch. Surely if you're substituted and you refuse to leave the pitch, then that should merit a red card?

Wikipedia: Kepa Arrizabalaga (Playing position: Manager)
Wikipedia: List of Chelsea managers

3) Oliver Langford (referee)

Of the hundreds of football matches I've ever attended, I can't remember many occasions when I came away thinking, "Hey, what a great chap that referee was!" Obviously, it's far more common for fans to be left feeling angry at the referee, especially when the result doesn't go their way.

Oliver Langford was the referee in charge for Notts Forest's 2-2 draw with Swansea in July 2020, and one Nottingham Forest fan was left so upset with his performance that he edited his wiki entry to read...

Oliver Langford: The target of an angry Notts Forest fan.

'...he is not qualified to cross the road without assistance and certainly incapable of officiating anything above an under-11's five-a-side tie.'

To be fair, I once refereed a five-a-side game when I was still at school, and it's harder than it looks!

Wikipedia: Oliver Langford

4) Manchester United

This next example of vandalism is by a Man United fan who, like most Man United fans and in fact football fans in general, doesn't have a very high opinion of the Glazers. The exact entry contains strong language, so I've provided a censored version below...

Glazers out.

Although I'd also like to see the Glazers kicked out of football, the actual vandalism itself isn't particularly clever or funny in itself.

What I actually found amusing was that when a wiki editor removed it, they categorised it as 'possible vandalism'.

Possible? You mean there's some doubt about it? You're suggesting there's a possibility that 'Glazers out! **** those *****!' was a legitimate wikipedia entry?

Wikipedia: Manchester United

Cautionary note: Be aware that the link contains strong language.

5) Ron Atkinson (consumer of Lucozade)

The thing I like about this next example of wikipedia vandalism is the way it reads perfectly natural, until it suddenly slips in a random sentence of stupidity...

Ron Atkinson: Consumes nothing but Lucozade.

'He also consumes nothing but Lucozade, which may explain why he cannot be killed by conventional means.'

For the benefit of any younger readers who are ignorant of football history, I should perhaps point out that Ron Atkinson was a former footballer, manager and pundit, and one who couldn't be killed by converntional means.

Wikipedia: Ron Atkinson

6) Dorking F.C. (founded by aliens)

Finally, not a lot of people know this, but apparently, according to wikipedia, Dorking F.C. are one of the few football clubs in the world that were founded by aliens!

Dorking F.C.: Some claim they originated from Uranus.

"Dorking are also one of the few football clubs in the world that were founded by beings from a planet other than Earth."

Hang on a second? One of the few? You mean there are others...

Wikipedia: Dorking F.C.

You can find more examples of wiki vandalism in my previous blog posts:
Wikipedia vandalism (part 1)
Wikipedia vandalism (part 2)