Trivial 999 emergency calls (part 3)

An injured banana in need of medical attention.

I've mentioned before on the Charles Fudgemuffin blog that some people seem to treat the 999* emergency telephone number as a 'General Enquiries' helpdesk for the most trivial of issues.  Here are some more ridiculously trivial phone calls which the callers deemed worthy of treating as an 'emergency'.

* Or 911 for the benefit of any US readers.

1) "Is your emergency fire, ambulance, or fruit related?"

One bizarre person from Nottinghamshire rang 999 to report that they had overcooked a banana!

2) "I'd like help breaking in..."

One drunk person rang 999 because they had locked themselves out of their house.

An artist's impression of the milk in question.

3) Milk meltdown

London Fire Brigade received an 'emergency' call from a mother who wanted her baby's milk warmed up.

4) "Our father..."

One man rang 999 for help in reciting the Lord's prayer!

5) A close shave

One woman rang 999 to ask for an ambulance to take her to hospital after cutting her legs in the shower while shaving.

Toothache must have been horrible if you were a dinosaur
because there weren't any dentists in those days.

6) Toothache tragedy

A concerned brother rang 999 to ask for his brother to be taken to hospital. When the call handler asked what his brother's medical emergency was, he replied, "Toothache."

Note: I've had toothache and it's absolutely horrible, so I'm not belittling toothache. However, it's hardly a matter of life or death.

7) The stress of washing up

One woman rang 999 to claim she was too distressed to do the washing up after smoking a cigarette.

Legal Note: This sandwich is not out-of-date
and is used purely for illustrative purposes.

8) Snack Attack

London Ambulance Service received a 999 call from a caller who was concerned that they had eaten an out-of-date sandwich.

9) Rodent rescue

Someone rang 999 to report that there was a squirrel in their house.

Ghosts are not classed as an emergency.
(Unless they're in need of immediate medical attention.)

10) Scary Emergencies

The emergency services should only be contacted for serious emergencies, and yet Thames Valley police reported that they had 13 calls about ghosts, zombies, vampires and witches! A spokesman said, "Callers have reported being chased by zombies, have raised concerns that a friend is a vampire, or said they're being victimised by witches."

If that sounds bad then things are even worse for West Midlands Police who reported taking 57 phone calls with a supernatural theme, concerning everything from aliens and UFOs, to ghosts and zombies!

It might seem amusing that some people are actually calling the police about zombies and aliens, but in all seriousness it's a total waste of police time which could be better spent investigating real dangers, such as werewolves and dragons, for example.

You can find more trivial 999 'emergency' calls in my previous blog posts:
Trivial 999 emergency calls (part 1)
Trivial 999 emergency calls (part 2)