Saturday, 19 February 2022

The Idiot Awards (part 4)

The world is full of idiots, seemingly more so than ever nowadays, and here at the Charles Fudgemuffin blog we like to recognise those idiots for their outstanding acts of idiocy. With that in mind, here are five more examples that are thoroughly deserving of an Idiot Award.

1) Ill-advised architect


The first Idiot Award goes to the architect* who designed this bizarre building:

* Or team of architects.


It's a typically weird and flamboyant building that modern building designers seem quite keen on nowadays. However, imagine the following scenario...

Your office is located at the blue dot. You have to get to a meeting at an office located at the red dot. You have two minutes to get there.

Surely offices should be designed for functional practicality, rather than to provide a puzzle quest! Anyway, if you're the person in that fictitious scenario, I think it's safe to say that you would fully agree with the nomination of this Idiot Award.




"Oh no! A shark interaction!"

2) Shark attacks Negative encounters


In another prime example of idiocy, shark attacks are to be rebranded as 'negative encounters' to show more understanding for sharks! In line with this, official shark reports will now refer to 'incidents' or 'interactions', rather than attacks.

When I first read this story I thought, 'This has to be a joke', but incredibly it's a real story!

I can't help wondering, are there really sharks out there who get offended by the term 'shark attacks'? And if they do get offended, then perhaps they should stop attacking people!




3) Driving in the dark


The next Idiot Award goes to the designer of this gear stick...

Six gears, plus reverse.

That's a gear stick. With the gears in braille.

Presumably for blind drivers?




4) Q is for squirrel


The next nomination for an Idiot Award is whoever created this alphabet guide...

Q is for, er ... squirrel, apparently.

Really? Of all the words beginning with Q in the English language, you decided to go for ... squirrel!

I realise that Q isn't the most common letter in the alphabet, but there are still plenty of suitable candidates which do actually begin with Q, such as queen, quilt or quiz, to name but three.

And to add to the stupidity, that 'violin' looks suspiciously like a guitar...




Henry VIII pictured before he started his
dream job working at a guillotine factory.
He'll beheading there shortly.

5) Catherine Parr


Finally, this week's last Idiot Award is a belated award, but it's thoroughly deserved. It goes to Henry VIIIth sixth and final wife, Catherine Parr.

As a reminder, before marrying Catherine Parr, the established pattern with Henry VIII's previous wives was:

Divorced.
Beheaded.
Died.
Divorced.
Beheaded.

And yet despite Henry's track record, Catherine still went ahead and married him!

I don't know about you, but I reckon if you marry someone who has had two of his previous wives beheaded, that's either amazingly brave, exceptionally naive, or incredibly stupid!

- - - - - - - - - -

Each of the five Idiot Awards winners featured this week are all worthy winners, but who is the biggest idiot of all? It's time to vote for your favourite...



There seem to be an ever increasing number of idiots in the world nowadays, so I'm sure I'll feature another round up of Idiot Award winners at some point in the future.




You can check out the previous Idiot Award winners in the blog posts below:
Idiot Awards (part 1)
Idiot Awards (part 2)
Idiot Awards (part 3)

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