Funny football quotes (part 7)

"Hooray!" The crowd celebrates the news that more funny
football quotes are to appear on the Charles Fudgemuffin blog.

Last weekend saw the end of arguably the most incredible season in the history of English football, so this week the Charles Fudgemuffin blog has a football theme, as I take a look at another batch of funny football quotes from footballers, managers and pundits, starting with an insightful piece of analysis from Phil Thompson...

1) “West Brom have won a few late points. Do those points help or hinder them? I think they help them.”
…Phil Thompson


2) “It's Ipswich 0 Liverpool 2, and if that's the way the score stays then you've got to fancy Liverpool to win.”
…Peter Jones


3) “The one thing that Cristiano Ronaldo has is pace, quick feet and a great eye for goal.”
…Chris Waddle (I think that's three things, Chris)


4) “Ireland will give 99% … everything they’ve got!”
…Mark Lawrenson


5) “He's one of those footballers whose brains are in his head.”
…Derek Johnstone


6) “I can count on the fingers of one hand ten games where we’ve caused our own downfall.”
…The twenty fingered Joe Kinnear


7) “And Brighton have beaten Southampton 4-2 which is exactly the same result as last year when they won 3-1.”
…Des Lynam


8) “Our poll has been unanimous so far: 81% of you think Loic Remy should go to Arsenal ahead of Chelsea.”
…Sky Sports News on twitter

Sick as a parr..., er, donkey.

9) “I was feeling as sick as the proverbial donkey.”
…Mick McCarthy


10) “So this movie you star in, ‘The Life Story Of George Best’, tell us what it’s about.”
…George Gavin


11) “Ji-Sung Park is probably not as young as he was when he arrived at Old Trafford all those years ago.”
…Ray Houghton demonstrates a strong understanding of the ageing process.


12) “Everyone who wants to win it has to finish above Chelsea, for me.”
…Mark Lawrenson


13) “The only way you are going to win games is by winning.”
…John Carver


14) “And the score is nil-nil, just as it was at the beginning of the game.”
…Mike Ingham


15) “Can you believe it? James Beattie's hit it on the 18-yard line … 22 yards out!”
...Chris Kamara

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'Dilly Ding! Dilly Dong! The Leicester City 2015-16 Premier League Story (Told In Quotes)' is available for kindle from Amazon priced at £1.99/$2.99.

From pizza to champagne, from Jamie Vardy having a party to Gary Lineker’s undies, 'Dilly Ding! Dilly Dong!' is the story of the most incredible season in the history of English football, told in quotes by the players, managers, pundits and fans.

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More funny football quotes:
Funny football quotes (part 5)
Funny football quotes (part 6)