Books

Charles Fudgemuffin is the author of the following books:

The Quiz Master


When the Deep Space Genesis agency discover the first potentially inhabitable exoplanet 'Nova Satus III', they plan to transport ten convicted criminals to that planet to use as metaphoric 'canaries in a coal mine', in order to test the suitability, and safety, of the planet's surface for human life.

However, even before the 'canaries' have barely started their journey, a mysterious hacker known only as 'The Quiz Master' takes control of the ship, and puts the canaries through a sick and twisted 'Last Man Standing' elimination game that will leave nine of the canaries dead, and only one survivor.

Who is this mysterious Quiz Master, and what are his motivations? And which of the ten contestants will survive?







Fly-Tipping


Fly-tipping: The deliberate act of illegally dumping unwanted waste or rubbish.

Burying alive: The deliberate act of disposing of an unwanted person by burying them alive. Also illegal.

- - - - - - - - - -

Alice Matthews liked to think of herself as being ‘socially conscious’. Her sister Mary described Alice somewhat differently. As far as Mary was concerned, ‘socially conscious’ was just a fancy way of saying you were a ‘self-important interfering busybody’. Mary was a firm believer in keeping yourself to yourself, and had warned Alice that her interfering ways would get her into trouble one day.

Unfortunately for Alice, her sister's cautionary advice was about to prove accurate...







The Freedom Lottery


(as Charles Futch-Moffin)


By the year 2069, the legal system and the entertainment industry had merged. The worst criminals of society were sent to Fragment Fields Prison with no chance of parole. If they ever wanted to see the outside world again, then their only hope was via the Freedom Lottery.

The Freedom Lottery was, depending on your point of view, a chance for long term prisoners to gain early release, or an exploitative form of reality entertainment. The highlight of each week's show was live footage of the previous week’s ‘winning’ prisoner attempting to gain their freedom as they made their way across the minefield surrounding the prison.

Malick Matthews, a long term prisoner at Fragment Fields Prison, had always insisted that the Freedom Lottery was 'only for mugs and suicidal maniacs'. However, when his circumstances change and his wife's life is put in danger, Malick's only hope of saving his wife is to join the 'mugs and suicidial maniacs' by signing up...







Dead Men Tell No Tales


Finlay Hawkins didn’t usually pick up hitchhikers, but he had a long journey ahead of him, so when he spotted a man at the side of his road with his thumb out, he figured some company would help pass the time.

However, after a seemingly pleasant introduction, things rapidly go downhill, and Finlay quickly realizes that picking up his passenger may well prove to be a mistake he regrets for the rest of his life.

However long that turns out to be...







We Come In Peace, and Other Short Stories


We Come In Peace, and Other Short Stories' is a collection of light-hearted science fiction themed short stories. The following short stories are included:

1) We Come In Peace

2) The Android

3) The Ferociosaurus

4) For The Greater Good

5) The Boy With Two Heads

6) Never Work With Children Or Animals ... Or Psychopathic Violent Criminals

7) The Darkness And The Light

8) Ranieri And The Eight Planets







How To Poison Your Husband And Get Away With It, and Other Short Stories


'How To Poison Your Husband And Get Away With It, and Other Short Stories' is a collection of light-hearted crime themed short stories.

A few words from the author:


"Modern media seems to have an ever increasing tendency to tell crime stories where in the end the villain walks off into the sunset millions of pounds the richer.

"However, in my opinion committing criminal acts is not something that should be portrayed in a positive light because firstly, it’s irresponsible, and secondly, in the majority of cases, it’s also misleading. In real life, criminals generally end up dead, or looking over their shoulder, or in prison, or meeting some other unfortunate and undesirable end.

"So with this collection of short stories, I wanted to differ from the increasingly popular formula and instead tell stories where the criminals end up in a bit of a pickle. As a result, none of the criminals in the included stories walk off into the sunset millions of pounds richer. Some of them perhaps emerge more unscathed than they deserve, but none of the criminals profit from their crimes."







Santa And The Naughty Elf


(as Charles Fudgemuffin Jr.)

Santa Claus has gone missing and his replacement, Neville the Naughty Elf, is getting up to all sorts of mischief while Santa is away. In fact if Neville succeeds in his despicable plans, this could turn into the most miserable Christmas ever!

Two of Santa’s loyal elves, Derek Droopy-Ears and Elvis Curly-Toes, are determined to do everything they can to stop Neville from ruining Christmas for everyone, but will they be able to track Santa down before it’s too late? Or will naughty Neville succeed and spoil Christmas for all the nice kids all around the world?







True Or False: A Light-Hearted Collection Of 100 Facts And Bluffs


If you're looking for a very formal 'True Or False' book written in an informative style similar to that found in an encyclopedia, then this probably isn't the book for you. Many of the facts and bluffs found in this book cover silly or trivial subjects.

One or two serious general knowledge facts may have slipped past the quality control department, but on the whole I've tried to keep things light-hearted first, and educational second.


A few words from the author:

"One of the things that surprises me about modern society is how even allegedly intelligent people can sometimes be fooled and taken in by tricks, deceptions and outright bluffs. The invention of the internet has created more opportunities to fool people and this potential gullibility of society places a big responsibility on any bluffers to ensure they only use the power of bluffery for fun purposes.

"Blufffery should never be used to manipulate people, or to promote anger or bad feeling. It should only be used for having a bit of daft fun, so when I was writing this 'True Or False' book I tried to keep that in mind.

"Each section has been researched thoroughly, and on a couple of occasions where opinions differ I've tried to mention both points of view. It's not a test though, so don't worry if you get a few wrong! It's not an exam. It's all just intended as a bit of light-hearted daftness."

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