Funny things kids say (Christmas edition)

Kids say the funniest things at every time of year, but this week the Charles Fudgemuffin blog specifically takes a look at funny things kids say relating to Christmas, starting with an unusual Christmas list inclusion posted by one of my friends on facebook...

"Dear Santa, For Christmas please can I have..."

1) An unusual request

"We've been talking about what the kids want for Christmas and Thomas just said what he really wants from Santa is chest hairs! He's a one off."

I have to admit that when I was younger and I wrote out my Christmas list, chest hairs was never something I asked for.

2) All dolls great and small

I love the way this next conversation highlights the creative ways that kids will justify the need for more stuff...

Charles Fudgemuffin's Christmas letter to Santa

As Christmas time approaches, it's time to get writing our letters to Santa. Here's mine:

Charles Fudgemuffin's Christmas list.

"Dear Santa,

Before I list the presents I would like for Christmas, I thought I would first mention that I've been very good this year.

Well, okay then, I've been good for most of the year.
Well, I've been good some of the time.

Okay, I've been good every once in a while.

Fine. Forget it. I'll buy my own presents!

Yours sincerely,

Charles Fudgemuffin"

- - - - - - - - - -

Merry Christmas to all readers of the Charles Fudgemuffin blog!

Lost in translation: Foreign movie titles

Previously on the Charles Fudgemuffin blog, I've featured movies where the Chinese translated title got more than a little lost in translation. This week I spread the net slightly further afield as I take a look at weirdly translated movie titles from all around the world...

"You're going to need a bigger blog."

1) Jaws

As I'm sure everyone knows, Jaws was a blockbuster movie about a deadly shark that terrorised the fictional New England island of Amity Island. It was a great title, and arguably the perfect way to capture the scary essence of the movie.

However, the French movie title, while not quite as catchy, was nevertheless also very appropriate because in France Jaws was known as 'The Teeth Of The Sea'.

Jaws > The Teeth Of The Sea

Funny reviews

I recently reported on a disgruntled Indian woman who purchased my short story 'How To Poison Your Husband And Get Away With It' then left an amusing review warning other readers not to buy it, because it was a short story, and not an instruction manual on how to kill her husband as she had expected.

On that theme, this week the Charles Fudgemuffin blog features a round up of other amusing reviews which brought a chuckle to my face.

1) "Too sandy"

To start things off, here's one reviewer who apparently doesn't seem to understand how beaches work...

"Bah! This beach is full of sand!"

"It's a great beach, just too sandy."

Sand on a beach! What exactly did they expect from a beach?