Sunday 14 December 2014

Three Christmas gift ideas for the shopper with more money than sense!

There are now only 11 shopping days until Christmas, so if you're looking for a unique and creative gift for a friend, or even for yourself, then here are a few ideas which are ideal for anyone with more money than sense...

1)  Sign up to the Time Travel fund!


Time travellers from the future, pictured tomorrow.
If you're looking for an exciting gift for the friend that has everything, then here's something they probably don't have. The chance to travel to the future!

The Time Travel Fund is a website where you pay ten dollars to register your details on the time travel database. Then once people from the future discover the secret of time travel, they will then refer to this database and come back in time to get you, so they can then transport you to the future! Wow! What a brilliant present! And I'm sure that people from the future will definitely refer to this time travel database once they inevitably discover the secret of time travel.

As if the chance to travel to the future wasn't enough, you also get a signed certificate on acid free paper which you can mount on your wall. People from the future can then use this certificate for verification purposes once they come back in time to get you and transport you to the future. Pretty amazing value for only ten dollars!
Time travel fund website




2) Buy a piece of the Moon!


"Picturesque plot of land available in an up and coming area,
just a small commute from the city centre."
If travelling through time isn't your cup of tea, then how about travelling to the Moon!

Here are two websites which claim to act as estate agents for property on the Moon, with MoonEstates also letting you buy land on Mars or Venus:
www.lunarregistry.com
www.lunarembassy.com

However, I would tread carefully before making a purchase, as Lunar Embassy claim that other similar websites are copycat companies with no authority, selling unauthorised products. It may therefore be worth paying for a surveyor's report before purchasing your plot of Moon land in order to verify the authenticity of your purchase.

In all seriousness, the Outer Space Treaty (negotiated in 1967 by the U.S. and the Soviet Union) established that no nation can own a piece of the Moon or an asteroid, and therefore according to Stephen E. Doyle (who served as NASA's Deputy Director of Internal Affairs) no lunar governing body is recognised, so all you are buying is a fancy but worthless piece of paper. If you've got more money than sense though, it could still be a fun gift, albeit one which, according to the following webpage, has no actual real value:
Can I buy the Moon?




3) Treat Your Dog To Luxury Dog Perfume!


A disgruntled dog expresses disappointment with his present.
If you've got a pampered pooch and you want to indulge them with an expensive gift, then one website you may be interested in is the Les Poochs website. Les Poochs offer a variety of luxury dog gifts including dog brushes, shampoos and even dog perfume! Some dogs can be quite smelly, so dog perfume might possibly seem like a reasonable idea, until you discover that a 4oz bottle of Les Poochs VIP parfum costs a rather steep $3,000!

I'm no dog expert, but I suspect that if dogs could talk and you asked your dog whether they would prefer a $3,000 bottle of perfume or a meaty treat such as steak or chicken, then I suspect that most dogs would probably opt for the meaty treat.
Luxury dog perfume from Les Poochs




That's it for now, but if the above suggestions aren't enough for you and you're looking for more ways to waste money, then 'Santa And The Naughty Elf' by Charles Fudgemuffin's younger brother, Charles Fudgemuffin Jr, is available for Kindle from Amazon.

1 comment:

  1. Hi, I'm a time traveller from the future and I'm looking for 'Sebastian Fiennes-Cooper', as I need to transport him to the future. Unfortunately he's not at his last known address, and when I explained to the current occupants that I'm from the future they weren't very helpful (in fact they threatened to ring the police).

    My basic salary is pretty low and I make most of my earnings from bonus (I get a commission for every person that I bring back to the future), so if anyone can advise me on Sebastian's current address I would be greatly obliged.

    Thanks for your help (or 'Tusentak' as we say in the future).

    ReplyDelete