Sunday, 14 July 2013

Even More Signs From Around The World

Crocodiles, unnecessary epithets and Draconian punishments


Following on from my previous posts entitled ‘Signs From Around The World’ and ‘More Signs From Around The World,’ I’ve now collected together even more photos of signs from around the world.  After much thought I've decided to call this post ‘Even More Signs From Around The World.’

1) God loves everyone.  Even solicitors!

The first photo is a religiously themed photo which demonstrates that apparently God’s love knows no limits.


God loves everybody.  Even solicitors, apparently.


2) In other news, water is wet

The next photo was taken at a crocodile park in Borneo and makes a somewhat less surprising statement.


Swimming with the crocodiles is not allowed.

"No swimming in the crocodile enclosure."  In other news, the Pope is Catholic.  And this just in … hot off the press … Alex Ferguson thinks the ref had a poor game last Saturday.


3) Childish translations

Next up is a childish photo of an unfortunately named restaurant
in Haad Rin on the island of Koh Pha Ngan.

Not 50%, not even 75%, but 100% Dong!

I have to admit I’ve never eaten at Dong myself so I can’t verify how tasty it is.


4) Sign for stupid people

The next photo is of a sign situated halfway up a steep hill which seriously underestimates the intelligence of its readers.

Helpful sign for the benefit of stupid people.

How stupid do they think people must be if they think we need a sign to inform us of which way down is?  Like, ‘Right, I need to get down to the bottom of this hill, so let’s start walking.’  Then ten minutes later, ‘Ar, nar!  I’m at the top!  How did that happen?  Ar … I bet you I know what’s happened.  I bet you I’ve walked ‘up’ instead of ‘down’.  Ar, hey.  I’m always getting those two directions muddled up.  I feel such a fool!’

In conclusion I think it’s fair to say that it’s an unnecessary sign.


5) Extreme fines

Next up is a sign located in Hanoi train station in Northern Vietnam.

Draconian penalties in Northern Vietnam.

It translates as, "Anyone caught smoking will be fined 50,000 Dong, with a fine of 100,000 Dong for repeat offenders."  It sounds like a very steep fine, but when you convert that into British pounds, it’s actually equivalent to a £1.56 fine for first offenders and a shockingly extreme £3.13 fine for repeat offenders.  Just another example of the excessively Draconian penalties handed out in Vietnam.

6) Unnecessary epithets

After a few photos from far flung destinations, this next one was taken closer to home and it's a photo of a local church called the Church of St Mary The Virgin.

St Mary The Virgin ... just to avoid any confusion.

You have to ask … was the epithet really necessary?  I mean, St Mary The Virgin?  Did it really need to be clarified?  I mean, what other St Mary could they have been referring to?  St Mary The Promiscuous?  St Mary The Loose Of Virtue?  Like, ‘Come on now, vicar!  St Mary?  Now which St Mary do you mean?  Do you mean the pure and chaste Mary or the ‘other’ Mary?  Come on, vicar.  Your sign’s far too ambiguous!’

Anyway, apparently the vicar at this church presumably felt that clarification was needed as to which St Mary they were referring to so to avoid all doubt, it’s named after St Mary The Virgin.


7) Live the life you love

The last sign features one of my favourite sayings and is found at the Snack Shack which you pass on the way down to the beach on Koh Phi Phi.

Live the life you love, love the life you live.

“Live the life you love, love the life you live.”  Wise words from the Snack Shack.  I would also add that if you don’t love the life you live and you live in Koh Phi Phi then there’s something wrong with you, given that Koh Phi Phi is a party-orientated tropical paradise.

Not recommended for prudes or squares.
That was even more signs from around the world.  You can find more photos of signs from around the world in my earlier posts:

. . . . . . . .

Like myself, Eric, the main character in 'How To Save The World: An Alien Comedy', also loves to go travelling (although he travels around the galaxy rather than the world), so if you’d like to read more about Eric’s adventures then the 'How To Save The World' saga is available for the Kindle app from Amazon:
The 'How To Save The World' books

Please note, the 'How To Save The World' books are suitable for ages 18+ and aren't recommended for prudes or squares, so if you prefer to try before you buy then Amazon also let you download a free sample of the first two chapters.

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About The Author

The 'How To Save The World' books
by Charles Fudgemuffin
Charles Fudgemuffin is the author of the alien comedy 'How To Save The World' books which are available for Kindle from Amazon.  The first book in the series is available from the following link:
How To Save The World: An Alien Comedy

As with all Kindle books, you can also download a free sample of the first few chapters.

Please note, the 'How To Save The World' books contain material suitable for ages 18+ and are not recommended for prudes or squares.