Sunday, 11 August 2013

Everything You Ever Wanted To Know About...

Which of the following book titles would be least likely to be a commercial success if it was published as a kids' book?


Everything You Ever Wanted To Know About...
At the moment I'm currently proof-reading the fifth book in the 'How To Save The World' series, namely 'How To Save The World: Part 3B - Revenge And Justice' ready for it to be published on Amazon within the next couple of months.

At one stage in the story, Eric, the main character, recalls a kids' book which he once wanted to buy for his nephew as a joke present.  In Eric's opinion the title of the book in question was a totally ridiculous idea for a kids' book and he jokily mocks how daft an idea it was to publish a kids' book about a subject which kids will clearly have no interest in.

This was based on a real book which I saw in a book shop one day, and Eric's mockery was fine when it was just in draft form and I was the only reader.  However, now that I'm at the stage where 'Revenge And Justice' is actually about to be published and other people will be able to read it, I feel a bit sly about mocking a real book.  I'd therefore feel more comfortable changing the name slightly and using a made-up name for the book.

I'm therefore looking for some help to decide what fictitious book title to use for this book which Eric mocks, and I need a book title which fulfills two criteria.  Firstly, it has to be a book which would hold no interest whatsoever for a young kid.  And secondly, it has to be a ridiculous idea for a commercially successful book.

So for example a book called 'Everything You Ever Wanted To Know About Opera' would fulfill the first criteria (as I doubt that many young kids are into opera music), but it might not necessarily fulfill the second criteria, as there could possibly be a few misguided opera-loving parents who might foolishly buy the book for their kids in the hope that their kid might also take an interest in opera music.

So if any readers or authors could spare a few moments to click which of the following options they reckon would be the daftest idea for a kids' book then I'd greatly appreciate it.  Here are the options:

Everything You Ever Wanted To Know About...


Like I say, the book title has to fulfill two criteria.  Firstly, it has to be something which a kid would open on Christmas morning and think, 'Are you for real?  Why would I ever want to read a book about *******?'  And secondly, it has to be a book which a commisioning editor at a publishing company would look at and scratch their head in puzzlement thinking, 'How on Earth did anyone ever think it would be a good idea to write a book called 'Everything You Ever Wanted To Know About *******'?'

Wallpaper, potatoes, salt, igneous rocks and Pascal's Triangle aren't the only possibilities for daft book titles though, so if anyone can think of a better suggestion for an 'Everything You Ever Wanted To Know About...' book title which fulfills the two listed criteria, then feel free to add a comment at the end of this post.

Footnote: Just for the record, I'm sure the real kids' book in question was a very well written book, so Eric is in no way criticising the quality of the writing.  Nor is he criticising its educational value.  He simply finds it a bit weird that anyone would ever think a kids' book with such a title would be a commercial success.

. . . . . . . .

Other recent posts:
Another Daft Office Prank
Scary Kids' Stories
How To Save The World: Part 3A - Hopes And Dreams
Even More Signs From Around The World
How I Got Thousands Of Followers On Twitter … Absolutely Free! by Lady Gaga

. . . . . . . .

'Hopes And Dreams' is the latest book to be
published in the 'How To Save The World' series.
The soon to be released 'How To Save The World: Part 3B - Revenge And Justice' follows on from the earlier books in the 'How To Save The World' series which are currently available for Kindle from Amazon:

Amazon.com:
How To Save The World: Part 1 - An Alien Comedy
How To Save The World: Part 2A - Be Careful What You Wish For
How To Save The World: Part 2B - By Whatever Means Necessary
How To Save The World: Part 3A - Hopes And Dreams

Amazon.co.uk:
How To Save The World: Part 1 - An Alien Comedy
How To Save The World: Part 2A - Be Careful What You Wish For
How To Save The World: Part 2B - By Whatever Means Necessary
How To Save The World: Part 3A - Hopes And Dreams

2 comments:

  1. How about, Everything you ever wanted to know about pencils.

    I can't imagine many people jumping up and down about that.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yeah, I like that one as well. I can just imagine a young kid getting that book as a present on Christmas morning and faking an excited look on their face when really they were thinking, 'Pencils? Hmm...'

    ReplyDelete

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About The Author

The 'How To Save The World' books
by Charles Fudgemuffin
Charles Fudgemuffin is the author of the alien comedy 'How To Save The World' books which are available for Kindle from Amazon.  The first book in the series is available from the following link:
How To Save The World: An Alien Comedy

As with all Kindle books, you can also download a free sample of the first few chapters.

Please note, the 'How To Save The World' books contain material suitable for ages 18+ and are not recommended for prudes or squares.