10 nerd jokes (part 1)

Binary code ... or is it?

Last week I rounded off my post '10 things in life worth knowing' with a daft nerd joke regarding binary code.

I have to admit that I've got a bit of a soft spot for nerd jokes, so this week I thought I would round up a few of my favourite nerd jokes and puzzles in a post creatively entitled '10 nerd jokes'.

Also, just to clarify, this time I'm talking in decimal rather than binary code, so this time there are actually ten rather than two. Non-nerds are therefore advised to stop reading now.

Some of these are quite old so apologies if anyone's heard most of them before, but anyway here are a few of my favourite nerd jokes, featuring maths, hadrons, and pizza.

1) There are 10 kinds of people in this world...
Those who know binary code and those who don't.


2) Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O."  The second scientist says, "I'll have some H2O too." Then he died.


3) The past, the present and the future walked into a bar. It was tense.


4) Two hadrons, Baryon and Meson, are walking down the street when Baryon starts crying all of a sudden.
His friend Meson turns and asks, "What’s wrong Baryon?"
"Everybody says I’m weird," Baryon moans.
"Keep your spirits up, mate," Meson replies. "We all have our quarks!"



5) Alcohol and calculus don't mix, so don't drink and derive.

Pi z z a

6) What is the volume of a pizza with a radius of ‘z’ and a thickness of ‘a’?
Pi z z a (Pi r2 x height)


7) There are two types of people in the world:
Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data…


8) Why do mathematicians always get Halloween and Christmas confused?
Because OCT 31 = DEC 25.


9) If the number 666 represents evil, is 25.8069758 the root of all evil?


10) And finally this last one is actually a true statement.  The majority of people have an above average number of legs.  (As long as you use the mean average and not the median or mode).

- - - - - - - - - -

Most of the above are fairly straight forward to understand, but number 8 might have confused a few people, so here's the explanation:

10 in octimal (base 8) is equal to 8 in decimal, so:
OCT 10 = DEC 8
OCT 20 = DEC 16 (8 x 2)
OCT 30 = DEC 24 (8 x 3)
OCT 31 = DEC 25 (24 + 1)

Hopefully that's explained the logic behind number eight and apologies if anyone thinks that including an explanation is a bit patronising*.

* 'Patronising' means when you talk down to someone.

That was ten nerd jokes and you can find further batches of nerd jokes below:
Nerd jokes (part 5)
Nerd jokes (part 6)